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Ala Meat Head

[ 09:12 ] [ 29 May 2023 ]

Have a great Memorial Day everyone.

Sarah

[ 10:58 ] [ 20 May 2023 ]

Hello All
Im online this day

Sarah

[ 10:57 ] [ 20 May 2023 ]

bhgvhg

Ala Meat Head

[ 10:17 ] [ 08 Apr 2023 ]

Have a great Easter.

nathu

[ 10:47 ] [ 07 Mar 2023 ]

Hope you are all doing great !

GoodDay

[ 15:21 ] [ 16 Jan 2023 ]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Ala Meat Head

[ 08:39 ] [ 31 Dec 2022 ]

Happy New Year!

GoodDay

[ 21:49 ] [ 24 Dec 2022 ]

Happy Birthday fo0k!!

GoodDay

[ 21:48 ] [ 24 Dec 2022 ]

Merry Christmas is82!!

M-XER

[ 15:27 ] [ 22 Dec 2022 ]

yes sir. I've got to get the maps again, just stuck on plain bf1942 right now.

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Battlefield 1942 [ISR] INTERSTATE RACING - IS82 FOR BF1942 - INTERSTATE 82 MOD :: Forums :: Other Stuff

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Here, have a slice of lol.

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Author

Post

FlaMiN

[ 12:09 ] [ 07 Oct 2010 ]

Joined: [ 06:22 ] [ 07 May 2004 ]
Posts: 2829

I was walking in a cemetery this morning and saw a bloke hiding behind a gravestone. I said "morning."
He replied, "No, just having a shit."

I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up.
She said I had to stop wanking.
When I asked why she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you"

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me.
I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends?

When I got divorced, my wife said she would fight for custody of the kids.
Took her out with one punch.

I met a 14 year old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, flirty and sexy, so I suggested we meet up.
She turned out to be an undercover detective.
How cool is that at her age?!

My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.
"It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.

I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits.

Disabled toilets. Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in.

I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed.
How could anyone stoop so low?

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.
I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it start?"

Ala Meat Head

[ 12:20 ] [ 07 Oct 2010 ]

Joined: [ 21:26 ] [ 06 Jun 2004 ]

LoL good stuff

Twisted Metal

[ 12:38 ] [ 07 Oct 2010 ]

Registered Member #78
Joined: [ 13:27 ] [ 13 Mar 2004 ]

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari.

FlaMiN

[ 16:10 ] [ 07 Oct 2010 ]

Joined: [ 06:22 ] [ 07 May 2004 ]

luls

.. no.. lols..

Two blondes standing either side of a river..

Blonde #1 "Come to the other side!"
Blonde #2 "I'm already on the other side!"

mistamontiel

[ 20:24 ] [ 07 Oct 2010 ]

Joined: [ 02:43 ] [ 14 Apr 2009 ]

..... edited..

a little over the line mista! FlaM

mistamontiel: Oopsy .. uhhhuhuhhuhuh

Twisted Metal

[ 00:37 ] [ 08 Oct 2010 ]

Registered Member #78
Joined: [ 13:27 ] [ 13 Mar 2004 ]

This one within boundaries? One of my favorites:

Two guys are in a bar discussing their sex lives.
One guy says to the other, "How's your sex life buddy?"
The other guy says, "Not too good. Every time me and the missus have sex, she loses interest half-way through. It's very frustrating."
The first guy says, "Yeah, I know what you mean. I used to have the same problem, but I found a cure. I hid a starter pistol under the bed. When she started to run out of steam, I simply fired the starter pistol. It gave her such a fright that she got all excited, and couldn't get enough. I wish I'd done it years ago."
The other guy says, "OK, I think I'll try that."
The next day they are back in the bar again, and the first guy says, "How did you get on with the starter pistol?"
The other guy says, "Don't talk to me about starter pistols! Last night we were having a little 69. As usual, she lost interest half way through, so I fired the starter pistol, just like you said."
The first guy says, -"Sooooooooo?"
The other guy says, "She bit my cock, shit in my face, and a guy came out of the wardrobe with his hands up!"

Captain Winters

[ 15:05 ] [ 08 Oct 2010 ]

Registered Member #584
Joined: [ 22:01 ] [ 16 Sep 2004 ]

Hahahahaha very good stuff!

Twisted Metal

[ 16:49 ] [ 09 Oct 2010 ]

Registered Member #78
Joined: [ 13:27 ] [ 13 Mar 2004 ]

This has to be one of the best performances ever (not counting my girlfriends) Clickalink: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-AMhlLwK_F8&feature=player_embedded#! Flame or someone please fix the embedding.

its all screwed up atm

Twisted Metal

[ 17:06 ] [ 09 Oct 2010 ]

Registered Member #78
Joined: [ 13:27 ] [ 13 Mar 2004 ]

GoodDay

[ 18:22 ] [ 17 Oct 2010 ]

Joined: [ 22:22 ] [ 15 Jun 2010 ]

Little boy blue..........he needed the money.

GOLD MAP PACK coming soon!!

146 's............................................................"I said GOODDAY SIR!!"............................sig by FlaMiN!!

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